Where have you been?!

Did you miss me? I thought about writing a few times, but it seemed overwhelming. Booting up the computer is hard, I don’t have a keyboard thingee for my iPad, and I’m not brave enough to type from my touchscreen or my fancy new phone. It seems like it would be too tiny and I would miss more mistakes than I already do now…

We’re still trying to figure out my thyroid meds, so in the mean time the exhaustion, aches and soreness, and super-mega brain fog have taken over. And let’s not leave out my crazy mood swings either… blah. This week has been me slowly trying to become one with the recliner. La-Z-Boy has rejected my attempts at osmosis. Bear still loves me despite my bouts of depression, frequent migraines, and forgetting everything; he’s a saint!

Stuff has happened other than me trying to meld with the recliner! We threw a luau for the kids’ birthday, my parents constructed a monstrous zip-line with tire towers in my back yard, the kids have started first grade (much like me, they are not morning people), and we attended a super fun Medieval themed Labor Day party with my parents. My little heathens even won the children’s costume contest, because they’re beautiful and so were their costumes…

I made my own costume from a thrift store dress. I was pretty excited. I was all, “Upcycle!!!” I’ll take pictures showing the process and then other people can see it and think, “Yeah, I could do that!” And we’ll all be super cool in our homemade costumes, saving the environment one Medieval dress at a time! Woo!

…..

It was not to be. As I worked through the night I grew weary and pictures were not taken. It turned out cute, but seriously, I would rather buy a pattern or order a costume next time!

Speaking of clothing, have you heard of LuLaRoe? If not, run! Run as fast as you can, and don’t look back. It’s a terrible addiction, and I can’t seem to stop myself. Retail therapy has gone rogue, hybridizing with a form of gambling as people post a limited number of patterns and sizes, first come, first serve… They have these events on Facebook called “Pop-up Parties” or “Pop-up Boutiques” and it’s like throwing chum in the water for these ladies. Women get rabid.

At first I thought they were ridiculous. Why would I pay $22 dollars for a pair of leggings when I can get them at Walmart for $5?Leggings are leggings, am I right? Then I ordered a pair, just to shut my friends up and prove them wrong. They are the softest, most comfortable, non-see-through, super wonderful, did I mention softest?, I-want-to-live-in-them-forever leggings ever. Ever! Now I love them, and not just the leggings, the skirts too! And they have tunic tops to cover your bum if you’re shy in your leggings. I haven’t tried a dress yet, because I prefer to try them on in person, and I’ve been ordering them all from friends that live where I grew up. But the twirly Azure and Maxi skirts are heaven.

Anyway, it’s madness. The last “pop-up” started posting available leggings while I was in the shower. So there I am, shaving my legs, leaning over the edge of the tub to make sure I don’t drop my new phone in the water because if another woman posts her email before me on the pair I want it’s too bad for me, there’s only one of that pattern! Why?!?! Seriously, for leggings. I’m checking my phone in the freaking shower for leggings. I’m insane.

More people have been pushing me to write a book lately. I’m just not sure that I’m that funny. I mean, sure my friends think I’m funny, but I can’t imagine people that don’t know me thinking I’m funny. I just assume they’ll think I’m a jerk, get offended, and then the trolls come out, I’ll cry, go into a deep depression, and become more of a hermit than I already am. Also, I’ll resent all those that pushed me to write a book. <-Best case scenario. So for now, to test the water as it were, I’ve started a twitter. It’ll let me post more of my quips and random thoughts and insanity in a public forum as opposed to Facebook, which I have set to private. Then we’ll see how the trolls like me, whether I can withstand the criticism, whether people who don’t love me actually think I’m funny, and we’ll go from there. I assume if I gain enough popularity I’ll get signed for a deal, and my published tweets will be sold for $1.99 as a digital e-book on Amazon.com. Big dreams.

On the plus side, no one will judge my love of hashtags on Twitter! Whee! You can follow me at @BookofQuirky because it’s a book… and I’m quirky… and it’s all I could think of at the time. Let the laughter and trolling begin!

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s